Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows

 

starstar

 

 

With the fate of the planet in the balance, only the reptiles can save us. Heaven help us.

 

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows

 

There’s an indestructible villain on the loose, an alien presence in the wings and the very future of the planet at stake. If that sounds like the formula for your typical multiplex fodder, then this remake of the 1991 sequel Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze does have a few novelties up its sleeve. Id est, the saviours of our planet are pizza-guzzling mutated reptilian dudes without an apparent care in the world. And yet they live in the shadows and in spite of saving New York in the 2014 reboot, receive no formal recognition for their heroics. Now they’re up against a fat, very pink, power-hungry octopus ensconced in a giant robot who is bent on destroying the world.

 

OK, so this is a live-action rendition of the comic books created by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird, but that doesn’t mean the film can’t flirt with the wow factor. While it’s visually more engaging than its 1991 antecedent, the remake/sequel is still a non-stop, chaotic affair catering to the ADHD mentality of mentally-arrested adolescents. The clue to the film’s manic, mind-numbing overkill rests at the credit of the film’s producer: Michael Bay. Had Steven Spielberg produced and Christopher Nolan directed, we might have been served a very different animal: something truly bodacious, dude. As it is, the directorial chores fall to Dave Green, he who brought us the cheap-and-cheerful, fiercely annoying Earth to Echo a couple of years ago. Now endowed with a budget of $135 million, his effects are more elaborate and the music more relentless, but the outcome no less humdrum. When Laura Linney pops up as police chief Rebecca Vincent, it’s a blast of credibility, like a shot of chilli in a Knickerbocker Glory. She plays it absolutely straight, bless her, even when confronted with the sight of a rhino and warthog cooking up a storm in a high-tech lab.

 

JAMES CAMERON-WILSON

 

Cast: Megan Fox, Will Arnett, Laura Linney, Stephen Amell, Noel Fisher, Jeremy Howard, Pete Ploszek, Alan Ritchson, Tyler Perry, Brian Tee, Gary Anthony Williams, Peter D. Badalementi, Brad Garrett (voice only).

 

Dir Dave Green, Pro Michael Bay, Andrew Form, Brad Fuller, Scott Mednick and Galen Walker, Screenplay Josh Appelbaum and André Nemec, Ph Lula Carvalho, Pro Des Martin Laing, Ed Jim May and Bob Ducsay, Music Steve Jablonsky, Costumes Sarah Edwards.

 

Nickelodeon Movies/Platinum Dunes/Gama Entertainment/Mednick Productions-

Smithrowe Entertainment-Paramount Pictures.

111 mins. USA. 2016. Rel: 30 May 2016. Cert. 12A.